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Published November 12, 2009 11:30 am - When it comes to reminding youngsters about polite manners, moms come in handy.

Polite language goes a long way


By JIMMY LOWE
For the Daily Times

GLASGOW

When it comes to reminding youngsters about polite manners, moms come in handy. Occasionally, though, it takes something else. Once for me, it took a rock.

Now, this is what got me meditating on manners today: We were at a restaurant with Daughter Number One and her family. The grandkids had finished eating when the little boy asked, “Granddaddy, can I have a quarter?” His mom corrected him, “Is that how you are supposed to ask?” The grandson rephrased the request, “Can I PLEASE have a quarter?” Since there were three youngsters, I fumbled in my pocket for 75 cents and then they trotted off to a gumball machine. A collective “Thank you” only came after being prompted once again.

Before I began composing these words on this computer, I was using it to print photos. By mistake, I had placed the photo paper upside down in the printer’s tray. A notice popped up on the monitor, “Please remove the paper from the tray.” I was instructed, most politely, how to correctly place the paper.

Whether it comes from grandchildren or computers, I appreciate polite language.

Likely I will forever remember one particular student from the first class of the first day that I ever entered the classroom as a teacher. As I walked up and down the rows, passing out forms for students to complete that day, only one student offered a “Thank you.” Almost four decades later, that’s the only scene from that day’s experiences that has not become erased from my memory. I remember that student’s name, where that student was sitting in the classroom and most of all, I remember how I appreciated that seemingly insignificant, yet most welcome response.

Polite language allows us to cast away arrogance and humble ourselves, creating a respectful attitude that promotes goodwill from one to another. Polite communication is one example of good manners that not only benefits the receiver, but the sender, as well.

Even though I try to respond politely and respectfully to those I come in contact with, sometimes I fall short. I am, after all, a flawed individual.

For a time when I was young, I fell short with a fellow who had offended me. I still had to interact with him, yet I found it difficult to remain in good humor while in his presence. I was awkward when it was necessary to speak with him, and I stuffed my hands into my pockets and avoided looking into his eyes.

One day I was inspired to turn that relationship around. I decided to forgive him even though he had not apologized. I began to carry a rock in my pocket for a while. When I was around him and my hand went into that pocket, I was reminded by the rock to act differently. The hands came out of the pockets, my eyes met his and I was polite and smiled as we talked. Soon I found I didn’t need the rock as a reminder. I can’t be sure if he ever changed, but I know I did.

So, whether it’s being coached by a mom or being reminded by a rock, we can become conditioned toward a positive attitude. It’s so simple, even a kid can learn. Soon it becomes a habit. And it’s a habit worth developing.



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